Void

I've always felt the void of a certain someone in my life. Someone who can listen to me everytime, someone whom I can talk to when I'm low, someone who knows me inside out, someone who's always ready to lend a helping hand to me, someone with whom I can share all my thoughts - ALL of them, someone who actually knows me to the core, a shoulder to cry on. This fact should not be taken as my 'desperate need' for a girlfriend. Although I never had a girlfriend, but I don't need one 'coz I'm happily single. In fact, this person could be anyone - a friend, a sibling, a cousin, a net friend - anyone for that matter. The reason there's no such person for me is because of the way I am and perhaps have always been. I am a kind of person who never shares his thoughts with anybody, especially the negative ones. I do not like to trouble others. I do not like to discuss about my life with anyone, no matter how close you are to me.

I know you have a doubt about my last statement that writing blog posts on my life and problems thereof certainly contradicts that statement. But blog posts do not say it all. I know where to draw a line. And besides it, they can have a lot of interpretations. They are just the way YOU see them. It all depends on the readers' state of mind.

I do not mean to say that I do not feel attached to people close to me. I certainly do not mean to say that I don't share anything with my friends, siblings or cousins. I do but again as I said, I know where to draw a line. I have a lot of good people around me including family members, siblings, cousins and friends. But may be its the relation or the bond that I share with them prohibits me from saying what I want to.

Many people suggest that I should be sharing my problems with a few close ones. But I don't feel like. I believe that a problem is MY problem, and why trouble others. I know ninety-nine percent of the readers won't agree to this statement. But that's what I think. So guys, please don't think I don't trust you or something, its just my nature that I don't share my thoughts. Sharing thoughts and trusting someone are TOTALLY different things.

I understand the fact that things are not going perfect for me. Still I feel I should not be treated in the way I was treated in the past 10-12 days. I am tired of being taken for granted. It was really difficult to cope up from the shock. I'll try my best to be the same very shortly. My sincere thanks to all of them who tried to cheer me up, who tried to solve my problem and help me out all these days. And I'm really sorry to those to whom I've been rude 'coz of my mood.

I know I have moved away from the topic. This is not what I initially planned to write. But I guess its okay. I penned down what I wanted to say. And more important is that I wrote something 'coz I wasn't feeling like writing anything.

PS : THANKS for 'bearing' this post.