Rajinikanth Rocks ! - version 2.0

RAJINIKANTH is back... A few more reasons why Rajinikanth is undisputedly the number one !

1. Rajinikanth can strangle you with a cordless phone.
2. Rajinikanth can drown a fish.
3. The last digit of pi is Rajinikanth. He is the end of all things.
4. Rajinikanth got small pox when he was a kid. As a result small pox is now eradicated.
5. Words like awesomeness, brilliance, legendary etc. were added to the dictionary in the year 1949. That was the year Rajinikanth was born.
6. Rajinikanth sneezed only once in his entire life, that's when the tsunami occurred in the Indian ocean.
7. Where there is a will, there is a way. Where there is Rajinikanth, there is no other way.
8. If at first you don't succeed, you're not Rajinikanth.
9. Rajinikanth proves Newton wrong all the time. Every time he performs an action, he simply eliminates anything and everything that can provide the reaction.
10. Archaeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined “victim” as “one who has encountered Rajinikanth”.
11. Rajinikanth killed the Dead Sea.
12. Rajinikanth did in fact, build Rome in a day.
13. Rajinikanth kills Harry Potter in the eighth book.
14. The last time Rajinikanth killed someone, he slapped himself to do it. The other guy just disintegrated. Resonance.
15. Osama Bin Laden is hiding in Afghanistan not because of fear of America but because of fear of Rajinikanth (Actually Rajinikanth caught Osama twice but set him free because Rajinikanth hates America)
16. Rajinikanth taught Michael Jackson how to dance.
17. Pakistan attacked India 3 times.... Not because they wanted Kashmir but beacause they want Rajinikanth... (All the 3 times Rajinikanth alone saved India)
18. Bruce Lee and Mohammed Ali were champions in their sports because they never faced Rajinikanth.
19.  Second world war stopped because Rajinikanth threatened to step in and destroy all nations if they don't stop.
20. If a person says most destructive weapon in Nuclear Bomb it means he has never met Rajinikanth.

[ courtesy : Shashank Chorge ]

Rajinikanth ROCKS !

Rajinikanth is the great Indian super hero. For more details, just "google" him. Here are some glimpses of what this super hero can do. And YENNA RASCALLA, no one laughs while reading this. MIND IT !

1. When Rajinikanth does push-ups, he isn't lifting himself up. He is pushing the earth down.
2. There is no such thing as evolution, it's just a list of creatures that Rajinikanth allowed to live.
3. Rajnikanth can divide by zero.
4. Rajinikanth can judge a book by it's cover.
5. Rajinikanth can delete the Recycle Bin.
6. Rajinikanth can slam a revolving door.
7. Rajinikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes.
8. Rajinikanth can make onions cry.
9. Rajinikanth destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
10. Rajinikanth once got into a knife-fight. The knife lost.
11. Rajinikanth never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself in fear.
12. Rajinikanth doesn't breathe. Air hides in his lungs for protection.
13. Rajinikanth does not own a stove, oven, or microwave, because revenge is a dish best served cold.
14. Rajinikanth has already been to Mars, that's why there are no signs of life there.
15. Rajinikanth doesn't move at the speed of light. Light moves at the speed of Rajinikanth.
16. Rajinikanth knows Victoria's secret.
17. Google won't find Rajinikanth because you don't find Rajinikanth; Rajinikanth finds you.
18. Rajinikanth leaves messages before the beep.
19. Rajinikanth calls Voldemort by his name.
20. Rajinikanth’s calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Rajinikanth.
21. Rajinikanth once had a heart attack. His heart lost.
22. Rajinikanth is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
23. Rajinikanth doesn’t wear a watch. He decides what time it is.
24. When you say “no one is perfect”, Rajinikanth takes this a personal insult.
25. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Rajinikanth could use to kill you, including the room itself.
26. When Rajinikanth is asked to kill some one he doesn't know, he shoots the bullet and directs it the day he finds out.
27. Rajinikanth can answer a missed call !!!
28. Rajinikanth can hit 16 runs in one ball.
29. Usain Bolt runs faster coz he is very afraid of Rajinikanth.
30. When anyone shoots on Rajinikanth, he can break the bullet by his blade.
31. Rajinikanth doesn't need a gun to shoot a bullet, he just throws it with his hand.
32. Rajinikanth can be the highest goal scorer at a football game being a goal keeper. He can score goals from goal kicks!
33. Rajinikanth can create typhoons with his legs.
34. Rajinikanth can stop a tsunami by just blowing it away by his mouth!
35. Rajinikanth can clap with one hand.
36. Rajinikanth can sleep with his eyes open !! 
37. Rajinikanth's hands are longer than law ! 
38. Rajinikanth never appeared for an exam. Exams disappeared with the fear of Rajinikanth.
39. When its pouring from the sky, its not heavy rains, its Rajinikanth crying when he's upset.
40. There are some things humans can't do. For everything else, there's Rajinikanth.

SAL-MAN-IA

That's a word coined by me. Its short for Salman Mania.

This is a particular form of Celeb Craziness, particularly for Salman Khan. I don't understand why people are so crazy about celebrities. I do not find anything different in them. They have two eyes, so have I and I have specs too. They have two ears, so have I. They have one nose, so have I, pretty clean too. They have a pair of lips, so have I. (Should I say kissable too... :p)

I'm getting on your nerves. Isn't it? Well, there were some people who got on mine too. Salman aaya yahan, to mujhe kyun tang karte ho yaar? I got a lot of calls from people asking me if I went to see him. I told him I've already met him earlier on a flight from Bombay (sorry Sena-men, both Shiv Sena and MNS, but it was Bombay then) to Goa.

I got carried away. I'm here not to describe my personal experience, but to comment on 'Celeb Crazy' people. Well, thousands of people had gathered here and in Sumerpur, a nearby town, to have a glimpse of the much controversial actor. And at both the places the police had to lathicharge to control the crowd.

Amazing !! Isn't it?

I had a lot more important things to do than to bear the lathis of police. In fact, I didn't had any chance of facing the lathis, as Salman was a guest at a friend's hotel. And he had invited me to be a part of the function. Still, I preferred to stay away from the actor's blink-and-you-miss visit. He was here to attend a roadshow to thank the people of Sumerpur constituency on the behalf of politician-turned-actor-back-to-politics Beena Kak (in the pic), Cabinet Minister in Rajasthan Government, MLA from Sumerpur and filmi 'maa' of Salman Khan in 'Maine Pyaar Kyun Kiya?'. He also endorsed Rajasthan Government's much hyped 'Harit Rajasthan' programme.

Falna, Sumerpur and Jawai Bandh were on national news for two days. People said I could've been easily on TV. I would prefer to wait than be hit by lathis to be on TV. I can't handle this kind of celebrity crap !

I wish God could spare some time and re-consider the architecture of the top floor of these 'Celeb Crazy' people.

Peace !

Pics courtesy : Kiran Studio, Falna.